The Art of Sharing

Sharing has become a new word in our daily vocabulary in the household.  We try and teach Sloane this basic idea since in less than five months, she’ll have to do plenty of it when baby boy Clark arrives!

But I have come to realize that sharing isn’t something that you learn when you are a toddler and that’s the end of it. It’s something you have to do your entire life.

It happens in a major way when you get married and have to split times between families for holidays. You can feel the sense of betrayal as you walk out the door from your own immediate family to head on to the husband’s immediate family.

OK – that’s all in my head because I’m sure it’s just myself that feels like I’m betraying my family – I’m pretty sure they just open up another bottle of beer and go about their day!

It gets harder when you bring a child/grandchild into the family and have to split time between grandparents/aunts/uncles. The parents/sisters/brothers no longer care about what you or your husband or doing. It’s all about the baby. And when we leave from one house to go to the next, you again feel that lingering feeling of betrayal…

And this is not in my head … I’m sure my dad has said, “Why are you leaving us?” Followed by a pouty face. 

Sharing is a part of life and as I have been experiencing these new parts to the world of sharing, there is one part that I hadn’t really had to do.

And that is share my own siblings.

God bless both of them but for awhile, I was the only one with a significant other. We chuckle about it (but only for a second until we realize we are really aging ourselves) but my sister was 12 when Matt and I started dating. So you see… he has been around for a long time!

Lauren had a pretty serious boyfriend for a few years but they parted ways almost two years ago. One will never forget T-Mac though. At least not from my wedding…

My brother had a girlfriend for a few years, but once Libby got into college, they also decided to part ways.

So… it has basically been, me, Matt, Jord and Lauren at Hills family functions. One can never say that we didn’t enjoy each other’s company. See pic below.

But in the recent months, things have started to change.

We’ve had a shake-up in the relationship sector of the Hills family. And the shake-up involves my brother and sister.

My sister started dating a lovely man by the name of Sam (last name to be withheld since now he is an official man of the uniform) whom she had basically been best friends with since her freshman year in college. They have been ‘official’ since August and so Sam has been able to soak in some time with the Hills clan.

One needs A LOT of time to soak in with us before they truly grasp what we are about slash what is wrong with us.

My brother just recently started dating a gal by the name of Alex, who just so happens to be one of my cousin Maria’s good friends (as well as her husband’s cousin). Maria actually set Jord and Alex up and from what I’ve seen and heard, the woman is a good matchmaker! I have yet to meet Alex (which I hope changes in a few weeks!) but my parents and sister have met her and have nothing but wonderful things to say about her! The only downfall we know of is that she is a Husker fan AND graduate (not something you find much of when it comes to Nebraska faithful). Luckily for us, Nebraska is no longer in the Big 12 so we shouldn’t have to worry too much about it.

Thank goodness she didn’t go to KU or we’d have an entirely different issue on our hands…

Anywho… from the looks of it, these two folks seem like they might be keepers.

Meaning they aren’t going away anytime soon.

Which means my days of leaving my house in Sedan at Christmas to go out to the Clark’s, only to come back and find everyone still there, might be short-lived.

Which basically means … I think I might have to … SHARE THEM with other families!

Now, I know what you’re thinking.

“Grow up, Allyson! Siblings get married. They start their own families. Life goes on!”

And I totally get where you’re coming from…

But these are MY siblings — who I actually enjoy spending time with! They are suppose to never really grow up, always be my baby brother and baby sister and always be at my parent’s house… waiting for me to come back from my other family’s house.

It never occurred to me that I would have to share them with other people and other families one day!

I told Matt last week that I was pretty sure I was OK with Jord and Lauren having a girlfriend and boyfriend, but wasn’t sure I was OK with the idea of them ever getting married. Matt informed me that they NEED to get married eventually because Jordan needs someone to clean up after him and Lauren needs someone to chauffeur her around so she doesn’t get lost under a bridge… or just lost in general.

Though I see his point, wouldn’t it be so much easier on everyone if they just stayed single?

Just stayed my single baby siblings forever?!

As you can see, sharing isn’t just a lesson you teach your toddler. It’s something you deal with your entire life.

And as Sloane and I work on passing toys back and forth, I will have to remember that sharing isn’t just about giving. It’s also about receiving. Even though Jord and Lauren might have to grow up on me and get married one day and spend time with other families, I will always know that at some point, they will make their way back.

Sharing sucks! Who thought this was a good idea?! 😉





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3 responses to “The Art of Sharing

  1. Aunt Sally

    Children going up and leaving to go off to college sucks too. But isnt that what we raise them to do? Parenting is not for the faint of heart!

  2. Jenna

    Other than laughing out loud at the bridge comment … I think I might cry. Maybe I identify a little too closely? 😦

  3. Allyson

    I knew you would! So far, the response from my family has been, “So… I read your blog…” like I had wrote something absolutely absurd! My response.. “its my blog, I’ll write what I want!” 🙂

    Sent from my iPhone

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